Driving Strangers
A Rideshare Driver's Blog
Do The Search Thing
What I've Been Thinking
Silent Running
So this weekend, I picked up a bug, bombed it with meds and felt good enough to work and not be contagious... but I've lost my voice. This isn't the first time that I've had this happen, due to a youth spent singing in rock bands, but it is new to this age of life, which involves rideshare.
There is nothing like the absence of an ability to make you focus on that ability, and you may be surprised by how much conversation happens in the course of a shift. If nothing else, the reflexive action of confirming name and address, as well as the presence of amenities or use of the trunk, is off the table... and if your passengers have a conversation that ties into your particular interests, or with obvious errors that you might be able to correct or inform, it's a kind of mild torture.
But for the most part, being forced to be silent as a driver is just the way this driver is choosing to do the work on this day, and some passengers won't even notice, especially if they are wearing headphones or on a phone conversation during the call. I suspect it's generally a negative practice for inspiring tipping, but small sample sizes do not inspire confidence.
Because the Rideshare Gods are funny, or depending on how you look at things, merciful... the shift that had the most Silent Running was, of course, during a good amount of surge price. Can't talk? Have fares that want to. Can talk? Have fares that don't. Leading to one of the last ones of the night, a multi-stop affair where I've got so much to say to the last passenger that, at the end of the ride, I'm furiously jotting down contact info on a post-it note.
Freedom of speech, folks. Pops up in the weirdest places.
The Command Performance
The side effect of this is how, especially when your hours are relatively consistent (i.e., I usually work nights), you are going to run into the same customers from time to time. And when your ride is distinctive, or you insist on consistently quirky amenities, it gets memorable.
Which can be a little awkward, because, well, I've got a go to list of conversational tactics and topics that I'll hit, rather than risk driving while doing Serious Thinking. And as much as you might want me to stick to playing the hits... you probably actually, well, don't.
So, if you get in the car and recognize me, by all means, feel free to start a conversation. But give me something new to work with, because (spoiler alert)... I probably don't remember the last time I took you somewhere, given the, um, 40,000 rides.
Also, this.
If I *do* remember everything we talked about the last time?
I might not have done so, with, shall we say, perfect kindness and charity...
Amuse-bouche bloglets
> There is no weather that will force Certain Women who attend Greek college events to wear a protective layer of clothing. On some level, you have to admire the commitment.
> There is also no weather that will keep Angry Old White Drunks from fighting in the streets of Trenton. I can only assume it had something to do with a halftime show being mostly in Spanish.
> A recant fare chose to purchase a ride for a guest, who they then gave the name of (g-word) (n-word), only without my web subtlety. The fare canceled the ride, which gave me the easiest $3.90 of the day, and presumably made the purchaser have to do it again. I'm not here to shame anyone for how they choose to spend their money, but, um...
> I picked up a Fredo, who did not (gravitas on) BREAK MY HEART. (If you don't get the reference, either I am too old, or you are too young, and maybe both.)
> I recently picked up a local college football player who was discussing his post-school options, most of which involved "the three-letter agencies." He was giving up his final year of eligibility, rather than risk his future earning power to repeated injury. Which made me think, well, if you actually are concerned about athletic achievement, I know of one three-letter agency you won't be applying to...
> There is a local chicken place in The Hood which is called "Super Pollo." It has a superhero chicken carrying a covered round plate, which presumably meanse his superpower is to kill and sell his friends and family for money. There is also a "Super Pollo 2".
Whenever I drive past these places, my mind starts to imagine
a) the rest of the Super Pollo Cinematic Universe, possibly with side order sidekicks
b) a Tupac-Bigge style rap battle between Super Pollo 1 and Super Pollo 2
c) having lucha libre wrestlers fight each other in Super Pollo 1 and Super Pollo 2 costumes, preferably on the sidewalk outside the restaurant
d) how, if I had All The Moneys In The World, all of this work would exist, and
e) how it is probably for the best that I do not have All The Moneys In the World.
> Marketing slogan for a beer in the hood: "It Ain't Gonna Drink Itself." Well, the truth is important...
> Recent email from Uber: "Let's stop human trafficking, together". Which my suspicious mind read as a tacit admission that Uber's been up to some things, and is making a very big presumption on me...
When restaurant reviews take a turn
What I've Been Thinking
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